MYTHOLOGY & RELIGION
THE CHURCH OF MUSRUM
Tamlaght is the last bastion of Musrumism, which it assiduously maintains in its most fundamental form. The theology is not particularly complex, being devoted primarily to the absolute proscription of sex, copulation, fornication, sexuality, sensuality, eroticism, allurement, laciviousness, pornography, craving, desire, pleasure, intellectualism, creativity, imagination, carnality, lust, free will, free thought, free love, love, lovemaking, flirting, sexiness, libido, voluptuousness, fleshliness, animal magnetism, perversions, biological urges, pruriency, concupiscence, aphrodisia, libidiousness,
lustfulness, desires of the flesh, indecency, erotomania, eromania, satyrism, satyriasis, gynecomania, polymorphous perversity, coitus, intercourse, cohabitation, lechery, nudity, carnal knowledge, orgasms, sexual climaxes, adultery, coitus interruptus, onanism, autoeroticism, self-abuse, oral-genital stimulation, fellatio, cunnilingus, irrumation, sodomy, bestiality, pederasty, heterosexuality, homosexuality, bisexuality, amphieroticism, lesbianism, sapphism, tribadism, whistling, singing, paraphilia, zoophilia, zooerastia, algolagny, sadomasochism, fetishism, narcissism, exhibitionism, necrophilia, coprophilia, scotophilia, voyeurism, transvestism, incest, taking baths without blindfolds, androgyny, hermaphroditism, gynandry, transexuality, pseudohermaphroditism, homophilia, any exposure of the legs above the ankles, genitalia, pudenda, reproductive organs, privy parts, gonads, testicles, cullions, spermary, scrotums, vulvae, clitora, labias (majora or minora), buttocks, belly buttons, nymphae, pubic hair, breasts, nipples or aureolae. All to say nothing of fun, amusement, diversions, recreation, play, sports, games, fiction, popular magazines, festivities, jollity, conviviality, mafficking, revelry, larking about, galas, high jinks, carnivals, fairs, frolicking, celebrating, frisking, romping, gamboling, binging, drinking of alcoholic or stimulating beverages, debauching, leering, orgying, carousing, making goo goo eyes, gymnastics, acrobatics, agonistics, games, dancing, cabarets, nightclubs, roadhouses, taverns, bars, dance halls, casinos, amusement parks, resorts, parks, merry-go-rounds, carousels, teeter-totters, smiling, laughing, jokes, puns, tall tales, fairy tales, toys, baubles, gewgaws, knickknacks, gimcracks, whim-whams, trinkets, the colors red, yellow, blue, green, orange and violet, heavy breathing, card-playing, athleticism, amusements, entertainments, delight, good humor, making merry, titillation, tickling, touching another person anywhere below their chin, gaeity, rompishness, capering, humor, funniness, drollness, comicality, hilarity, absurdness, wit, farce, pleasantry, spicy stories, parody, lampoon, slapstick, cleverness, waggishness, sportiveness, prankishness, saltiness, practical jokes, trickery, roguishness, whimsicality, clowning, clowns, circusses, tomfoolery, horseplay, jests, gags, double entendres, blue stories, belly laughs, giggles, quips, aphorisms, smart repartee, slang, paronomasia, palindromes, spoonerisms, antics, risibility, spicy foods, comedians, satirists, irony, burlesque, mocking, scoffing, jocularity, cheefulness, blithsomeness, bouyancy, hope, jauntiness, vivacity, chirpiness, geniality, brightness, radiance, gladness, animal spirits, friskiness, merriment, brilliance, intelligence, education, intellectuality, doubt, skepticism, scholarship, pedantism, creativity, art, polymathy, science, technology, electricity, mathematics, poetry, etching, architecture, photography, mezzotints, serigraphs, gum chewing, philosophy, contemplation, meditation and speaking ill of the clergy.